happy birthday to me

okay.. so yesterday was my birthday. added one more candle to the cake. i'm not gonna go on and on about how "old" i am feeling cos theoretically, i am not all THAT old. i'm only seventeen. its only been 17 years which is 6205 days since the day i was born.. it ain't that bad.

anyway, as i was saying, as it was my birthday yesterday, i decided to have a lil gathering of the 10 of us, together with michelle, stef's sister. it was sorta the last gathering of the year for the 10 of us. hopefully next year, it will be the same time, same place for all ten of us.

yesterday, for me and i am sure for the rest of them as well, it was a day of mixed emotions. wy was rather teary and sad throughout the whole thing except for bits and pieces like the "pulp" part.. and i was another whom could not hold back my tears all thanks to mel. haha.. as for the rest, i am sure they felt something or another as well. tasha for one, cried buckets after she left my place.

i would like to dedicate this post to my friends, especially especially especially to the nine of them, in random order *so that no one would murder me for putting their name last*; celine, jayne, stef, xin, tasha, mel, wy, dee, lyn. they are the ones who have walked this journey with me, sharing with me much joy, sorrow, laughter, tears, love and hate. they were there for me when i needed them the most. i lurve em to bits, shreds and pieces!! all i wanna say is thanks for everything throughout the years and so very sorry for the things that i have done to hurt you guys *intentional or otherwise*, all the best in your future endeavours, good luck, love you guys forever and forever, god bless always and take care! mwax!

cs-ing tips

i have been to cs so many times in the past month, i am like taking temporary permanent residence there. during the day of course. was there again today with a whole bunch of them.

1. never ever use the toilet in cs
my point being, they have renovated almost all their toilets to the 50 cents toilet with the exception of the one on the fifth floor near j-gen tower but i'm sure they are bound to do that soon enough. cs is trying to achieve sg standards too much too soon. the toilets in cs are not exactly up to sg standards.. and they are charging 50 cents for it whilst in sg, usage of the toilet is for free! if you really have to and have a movie, wait till you go in for the movie. cinema toilet is for free!

2. never ever attempt to change your order
lunch was so hilarious today, it was verging on being typical malaysin. joy tried to change the order when we were at season's for lunch. initially, she ordered chicken congee then decided to change her order to fish and chips. the girl who changed joy's order got all mixed up, thinking that joy wanted to add the fish and chips and do a take away for the porridge. when she came with it, we all just burst out laughing and the poor soul was just clueless. lol. and when it came to bill time, they gave us our initial bill and they took over fifteen minutes to sort out the whole thing, while i, went to get the movie tickets.

3. know your location damnit
cs is a very crowded, and at times confusing place to be in. trust me, its not all that hard to be playing hide and seek even with a handphone. wy, standing outside starbucks, told tasha coffee bean. and tasha being the blur pot, walked the route from bata, to the levi's side, to mcd, only to walk to coffee bean along with joy. god bless her soul. and lyn, as usual, never checks her phone for messages resulting in babe sending her two messages and having to call her after that.

4. know your stuff before you go shopping
today, while shopping with derrick, we *angel and i* has learnt many a thing about shopping for surf brands and street wear. when i say that, it means that there are a lot of shops selling imitation goods for the real thing. careful you get ripped off really. can barely tell the difference. then again, me and streetwear *stuff you get in cxo* never actually go together in a sentence, so really can't be less than bothered. not that i didn't already know bout this whole imitation and the real mccoy just never knew there was so much to it. it included doing your homework from the internet and catalogues.

5. never ever attempt to take pictures in cs except in eating places
today, as wy and a certain someone attempted to take pictures at the entrance of somerset bay while the rest of us were in there checking out skirts, they got shooed away by the security guard. and get this, they weren't even standing next to a single piece of clothing! all they had for the background was the wall and nothing else. ishh.

oh and last but not least, as we were walking by living quarters today, we noticed a very peculiar looking notice stuck on their window display. it read "house detective wanted" weird. we were all so puzzled as to what a house detective could be! the few of us just stood outside looking at the notice for a few minutes. at the end of it all, i concluded it was probably a job vacancy for a security guard. oh wells. look out for more cs-ing tips. that is if i ever go back to cs la *which is god knows when*

death?

what does it take for a person to realise what life is really supposed to be about? death maybe?
or maybe some terminal disease, say cancer or HIV+? does it really take THAT much for it to be a slap to the person's face, snapping back that person to reality?

recently, i have just found out that yet another aunt of mine has fallen into the hands of cancer. third stage cancer at that. and events took a very surprising turn. she has turned to buddhism and is very much pious now. these days, all she ever does is stay at home to rest and recuperate. she seems to be doing well physically. no doubt she has lost a considerable amount of weight, she doesn't look sunken or pale and pasty or anything of that sort. as for emotionally and mentally, i really have no idea what goes on in there. she must really be a walking jumble of emotions.

and now that tragedy has struck, everything has gone back to life being about family, fate, destiny, returning to the rightful path, religion yada yada yada. as she would say, everything is really fated. if its fated to happen it will. that's life. many things she said that day when i went to visit her was preachy and about life which sorta got me thinking. is that what it takes for people to actually treasure what they have and not get caught up in everything else? sad really, she's still young. married with no kids. she still has a whole life ahead of her and this had to happen. but we go back to the point of it being.. life.

done with xmas shopping

that's it. i'm done with xmas shopping for 2005. well, close enough. haven't gotten my grandparents', nor the chocolates or the pig. a soft toy that is. not the alive kicking and snorting ones.

ah wells.. gonna wait for my brother to come back tonight, we'll dissect what i bought for the family and he'll probably end up saying that i have either

a) no taste
b) no sense of priority
c) or that i should have gotten stuff which was more expensive

either way, i don't think its gonna be good. so to hell with it. at least i bothered to do SOMETHING knowing that he is wayy to busy to be bothered this year.

and now, i am officially broke. and its only the ... 20th! gone.. hope someone gives me my birthday allowance soon.. aih.. or that my brother pays me back!

have been in cs for the past few days. and yesterday they had a minor blackout. supposedly one of the mains fused leaving some shops in total darkness and others still bright as ever. i don't think cs has ever been that "dark" before.. nonetheless, cs was still abuzz with activity... everyone just going on with their shopping.. namely people like me.. haha

and although cs isn't all THAT big... its enough to play hide and seek in. either that or its just not fated. gonna finish up wrappin today when my bro gets back and finishes dissecting what i have bought.

christmas is round the corner people! soak up the atmosphere. revel in the sinful shopping. sing em carols loud and proud. but most of all, just sit back, relax and enjoy the ride. sides, there is always my birthday after christmas! ehehehe

shopping in malaysia

our country is said to be a shoppers' haven and heaven. right. the only place you'll ever see christian dior, miu miu and gucci all in one row is in kl. klcc to be exact. as for the rest of us who can't actually afford prada, burberry nor louis vuitton, there is always padini, giordano and well, voir. needless to say for us sad souls in jb there is only 3 no.. make that 4 shopping malls to head to. all of which i am sure we are very sick of especially city square. nowadays, i am there almost every other day, simply cos there is nowhere else to go. oh other than the fact that cs has a decent cinema which lm doesn't. ah wells.

any convent girl who has gone through spm will tell you that putting our bags in the new hall before an exam commences is hell. as kysha would say, if you can get through this, you can get through the mega sale. true? no, not true. the one little detail that sets us convent girls apart from everyday shoppers out there is that we have something called courtesy. we are courteous and almost always say "excuse me" when trying to get through. shoppers out there just push and push and push. exaggerated? doubt it. i have come to a conclusion that malaysians have mastered the art of weaving in and out of a sale as well as a pasar malam without uttering a single "excuse me". don't believe me? go try your luck at the pasar malam. if you go in a group, you might wanna tie a leash to each other lest you get lost or separated along the way. its survival for the fittest! by the end of the day, you will notice that you are blue black red all over. bruised from all that pushing and tugging and trying to get your way through. not fun i am tellin you.

shoppers haven? overrated i say. as for me, i am going to brave the hazardous, fatal and dangerous waters of a sale tomorrow once again with my pals. even if it kills me, i am gonna attempt to settle xmas presents tomorrow. i hope.

christmas is looming!

okay.. i think that was not exactly the most suitable title around. but you HAVE to admit that it speaks of only the truth. the untainted truth. the unadulterated truth. ok.. i'm digressing once again. back to the main topic! my point being is that although most shopping complexes and homes have already put up their christmas decors, *me being one of them who helped out. at people's homes of course. not at shopping complexes* it has only recently hit home that christmas is really coming. in fact, christmas is only over a week away.

christmas these days are getting overrated and derailing from its true meaning. nowadays, ask any kid on the street what he/she thinks about christmas and the first thing that comes out of that hole beneath their nose is "PRESENTS!" yes, we are reduced to this state where christmas is commercialised and everything about christmas is decorations and presents and presents, and well, more presents. whatever happened to christmas is about jesus christ.

so, everywhere you hear christmas songs playing. just the other day at vivos, my friends and i were rushing for a quick lunch before heading for a movie, they were playing this christmas cd where supposedly this choir was singing. truth be told, they sounded dead and were singing for the sake of singing. nothing else. no life to it. no meaning to it. no enthusiasm to it. its like "yeah... christmas is here. just the time of the year where we have an excuse to sing christmas carols.. AGAIN". another example would have been when i was at seasons with angel just yesterday. no wait, it was the day before. plaza pelangi were playing christmas carols. according to angel, they were blasting it louder than they were with the patriotic songs. oh, not to mention it was out of tune. just like a vinyl record gone wrong. gone awfully awfully wrong. ergh... shopping malls with funny sounding carols. not to mention even worst looking decorations!

speaking of which.. i wonder if any of you have noticed the signboards placed around malls like pp, cs and lm. *that being plaza pelangi, city square and leisure mall* it says selamat hari krismas instead of the usual merry christmas. WHAT IS THEIR PROBLEM?! i know they are talking about breaking away from tradition yada yada yada... but hello! selamat hari krismas? right.

as i was saying just now about presents. this is also the time of the year *birthdays aside* where people have pounding headaches trying to figure out what to get loved ones. there's always that fear of "what if it comes off too cheap?" "what if they don't like it?" "i should get everyone presents of equal value, right?" right. whatever. i for one am also having a little bit of a problem with my christmas presents. not so much what to get who, but more of the kaching side.. yup.. no cash. personally, i love presents. sure i do. but i would appreciate it even more if it was something i wanted and needed but just did not get down to getting it for myself. i appreciate the thought that people actually take time off to think of what to get me. but really, something from my wishlist would be nice. or cash would do as well. call me a demanding hypocrite or something, whatever, isn't it best if you get what you really want and the person who gives it to you doesn't have a headache trying to figure out what you actually want? i mean.. how am i supposed to know what a 12 year old spoilt brat wants for christmas right? not to mention, i have yet to complete my wishlist and the fact that i have yet to draw up a list of people i want to get stuff. *there is hope for you dennis!* christmas shopping this year ain't gonna be a breeze. i wish people would just tell me what they want so that i could get it for them. instead of me trying to figure out what they want, and they hoping that i will get them what they want. am i bringing you round in circles yet?

well, for now, i am at home, with nada cash, and no way out. maybe i should plonk myself in front of my notebook and start figuring out who to get what. or better still, maybe i should just call up that person and ask him/her what he/she really wants for christmas. solves my problem, no?

r.i.p. always

the saddest thing in life is to lose someone you love. the one thing that separates the living and the dead is a lil something called death. when it comes knocking at the door, there is no such thing as saying

"hey death! mind if you come back a lil later?"

"nah death.. i'm not your type.. go for the neighbour next door!"

"gee...i'm still young. there's a lot of things i have yet to accomplish"

nope. nada. zilch. as this year comes to an end, i start to ponder upon the deaths that has occured in this year alone. i, myself, have lost a dearly beloved. my grandmother. i dedicate this post to all whom have lost someone special, someone loved, someone missed and someone who has become a constant in our lives. this year, has undoubtly been a not-so-great year for some of us. hopefully next year will prove to be better. loving someone isn't easy. but letting go, difficult and moving on, the worst. r.i.p always grandma.



and i'd give up forever to touch you
cos i know that i'd feel you somehow
you're the closest to heaven that i'll ever be
and i don't wanna go home right now
and all i can taste is this moment
and all i can breathe is your life
and sooner or later its over
i just don't want to miss you tonight
and i don't want the world to see me
cos i don't think that they'd understand
when everything's made to be broken
i just want you to know who i am
and you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
or the moment of truth in the lies
so when everything feels like the movies
you'll bleed just to know you're alive

-iris-
-googoodolls-

take a bow

not really in the mood to actually post something decent, so i decided to post a lyric from a very very very old song. take a bow by madonna. yes, for any of you who actually recognise it, you'd realise that it's so old, it's antique! but it has been such a long time since i heard it, and when i heard it that day, i fell in love with it all over again. enjoy =)



take a bow, the night is over
this masquerade is getting older
light's are low, the curtains down
there's no one here
say your lines but do you feel them
do you mean what you say when there's no one around
watching you, watching me, one lonely star
i've always been in love with you
i guess you've always known it's true
you took my love for granted, why oh why?
this show is over say goodbye.
make them laugh, it comes so easy
when you get to the part, where you're breaking my heart
hide behind your smile, all the world loves a clown
wish you well, i cannot stay
you deserve an award for the role that you play
no more masquerade, you're one lonely star
all the world is a stage
and everyone has their part
but how was i to know which way the story would go
how was i to know you'd break my heart
i've always been in love
guess you've always know
you took my love for granted why oh why
this show is over, say goodbye

3 a.m.

you read me right. i am actually doing this post at 3 a.m. no actually, 3.20 am.. so do forgive me if i sound incoherent. i got back from sg at bout 2+ i think.. or was it 1+ either way.. i haven't been out THAT late in a while.. and some sertupeed donkey drivers who can't actually seem to drive properly on the roads... wonder where they got their licences from.. must be some half past six driving school la.. dang..

anyway, i went out to sg to send off my bro's girlfren..was at swensen's at about 11.. eating coit tower.. for those who are unfamiliar, it's ice cream! chocolate and vanilla ice cream with strawberry toppings.. whipped cream.. cherries.. chocolate bits... chocolate sauce... oooh.. melts.. forgot to take a pic of it though! wasted..

anyways.. angel is coming back today! yippies!! miss her so much!! am going to the pikom fair as well today.. need to get my flashdrive.. hopefully a one gig... *my mum has acknowledged the importance of having a flashdrive... and so i think it will be paid by her!* then there's a wedding dinner i'm supposed to go for.. no.. seriously i don't.. hence the word supposed... i mean.. think about it.. it writes in the invitation card 7.30.. but hey! malaysian stretchable time.. it'll end up starting at nine... mark my words.. then on sunday there's that driving tingie which i will probably rot at.. on monday!!! the day i'm lookin forward to.. singapore here i come!! hahahah

thats all for tonight folks... though i'm sure not many people actually read my blog.. sad sad.. many thanks to you guys out there who has been visiting my blog all this times.. really appreciate it!

making up for lost posts

okay dokay people.. its been SO long since i posted.. hence the title *points above*

i'm gonna start off the post with the day after bio. that's like.. one full week ago.. hahahaha.. time passes so damned fast when you are having fun. after the bio paper, which was like unofficially merdeka for us fifth formers, me, lyn and angel headed out to pp to get some presents, sort out some stuff.. yada yada yada. the surprising thing was this. we saw close to no one there! sacre bleu! i say close cos we saw someone there.. with yellow hair and a yellow shirt to boot...

thursday saw me and xin trudging..*well ok we didn't exactly trudge since we were seated comfortably in the bmw* over to celine's place at the crack of dawn. ok, maybe not crack of dawn.. but it was early enough. papa and mama chu weren't out of the house yet. then at about 12, or slightly before that, i headed out to cs with hanern and kevin, courtesy of hanern's ride *i'm still in one piece!* where the both of us caught hp&egof. we saw many many MANY people there. too many to say the least. including dennis. and no, ever since then, i never heard the end of it.

friday was a much better day to say the least. it was the official last day of our *with the exception of p.a. girls* exams... we are free from the clutches of evil school rules! muahahah... mrs e brought us out to cs for shopping and lunch.. then xin, angel and i went back to her place to help her put up the xmas tree... *the first was at angel's place on thursday* whereas mel and lyn stayed back to watch hp.

saturday. saturday. what did i do on saturday??? i can't remember! oh wait.. i remember.. i went over to yvonne's place later in the night to celebrate her birthday. hung out with the few of them plus debbie and alven. was a night of good fun and thereabout, good fun!

went out with dennis on sunday when dad went to pick mum from the airport. or rather, i met up with dennis on sunday at pp. managed to get him to treat me to a $15 ice cream from seasons. heheheh.. yum yum.. took a banana split and changed all three flavours to chocolate. have an obsession with chocolate ice cream!! *melts*

monday was THE DAY OF RECOGNITION! okayy that was a lil overdone.. exaggerated.. monday was the official official official last day of exams for everyone. accts paper was the last. and from there, people like xin, lyn, and jayne finally finally finished their exams. my hats off to them. i could NEVER do accts. i'd just die! and i, being the good girl that i am *ahem* decided to plonk myself in front of my revision books and start clearing out and sorting out all the mess and rubbish. in the end, i threw away many many stacks and piles of papers and have many more stacks of books to be given or sold to peeps. off with you books! i shall NEVER EVER EVER have to face you again! muahahahaha. *oops.. everyone's staring at me*

tuesday was spent out at tasha's place. i was there from like 8+ and it was only the two of us. so we just like.. died there.... ok.. more like rotted there.. two decomposing cadavers! lol.. anyway, when the rest came along, we didn't stop eating from 11-5+. no kidding. we just ate and ate and ate and ate. of course we had a coupla rounds of mahjong.. then we watched the sisterhood of the travelling pants.. messed around with nail polish.. yada yada yada.. now THAT was great fun! heh

wednesday, i believe, was yesterday.. *have lost track of my days since exams finished* the few of us headed out on a shopping spree at cs. jayne surprised me when she bought me a book i was dying to have. and it wasn't cheap! really love my bunch of friends! hehehe.. oh and lyn stayed over at my place.. which meant me on the floor.. she on the bed.. and the air con all night long!

today!!!! finally!!! thought i'd never get to today.. hahaha.. went out again with xin, lyn and hema. went to watch chronicles of narnia. though i must say that the battle scenes were a little amateurish as compared to lotr, the movie was great nontheless. it surely is a notch above harry potter! most definitely! think i shall go catch it again with celine.. and again with don't know who else.. o btw.. peter, played by william moseley is SO HOT SO HOT!! *melts*

i think that's all for today folks. quite a bit up there. should have been able to whet your appetite for a long awaited post from me.. *switches on perasan mode* hehehe. am undecided as to whether i should straighten my hair or highlight it. hmm.. views people! i wanna hear your thoughts.. which translates into tag my damned board! hehhehehe

p/s.. i'm feeling a lil demented today.. explains the wacky colours!

a lil update

hey you guys. this is gonna be a very short update. am very lazy to pen down my thoughts these days though i know i must. xin has very subtlely mentioned to me that she has seen the same post 6 times. angel asks me whether or not i posted for the day before actually venturing into my blog. as for the rest.. dennis.. thanks for coming all the time to check out my blog and its not so great status. that's right people. my blog is pretty much done up but there's still a bit of renovation to be done.. here, there and everywhere. the last skin.. well.. that got on my nerves.. tag was off its marbles.. there were no archives.. ahhh! it'll be the death of me.. anyways... just wanna say that whoever reads this.. please drop a tag.. nag me to actually sit down and do a proper post and all.. else i'll never get down to it. as for the rest.. enjoy the hollies while you can for I will be sitting around doing nothing.. while you lil ones head back to school! muahahahahahaha!