you weren't

you weren't supposed to leave us yet.
you were supposed to watch me finish my cross stitch.
you were supposed to buy me a farewell dinner before i left for new zealand for yet another year.
you were supposed to order roast chicken for me.
you were supposed to tell me what papers to take this year.
you were supposed to witness my 21st birthday.
you were supposed to meet my boyfriend.
you were supposed to come for my graduation.
you were supposed to help me with my first job.
you were supposed to enjoy my first pay check on a 10 course chinese dinner.
heck, we were supposed to set up a law firm together.
you were both supposed to grow old together.
you were supposed to enjoy many, many more years to come.
what now?
what am i going to do when i have a problem?
who do i go to?
what is she going to do?
you left her with a house and two dogs.
she's only 42.
but you just left us.
you didn't even say goodbye.
it wasn't supposed to be like this.