Friday, January 18, 2008

apathy

Sitting at the dinner table earlier, I felt like kicking myself in the shin even if Mother hadn't. I simply do not understand myself on days. Actually make that most days. Just when I'm with the family. That's right... just when I'm with the family.

I can't point out the exact moment, but somewhere along the way I picked up the not so essential skill of apathy, or as Mother would call it "being the spoilt brat who is throwing a tantrum because of sleep depravation".

With the family, its usually one face, and one tone of voice with absolutely no hint of emotion other than that of apathy. Mother thinks its the sleep depravation talking. Grandmother thinks I'm just being plain rude. Mostly, I would just like to be left alone to my own devices as I have been all these years. Only difference is that now, I do it with a "just leave me alone and I don't really care about what you're saying" expression.

Emotion surges through my voice now and again, its appearances few and far between. No wonder Mother thinks that Brother is a much nicer child to be around. If I were her, I would be utterly exasperated to bear an apathetic child like me, too!

Like I said, a not so essential skill I picked up.

But you know what? I really, honestly, seriously, do not care. So there.

6 Comments:

Blogger Raging Bull said...

you shouldl totally come to sgp when im around

1/18/2008 9:50 pm  
Blogger loopyloobi said...

it happens when you spend most of ur time away from family.
i get the same from my parents..."why are you being so rude?"
But yeah, independence comes at a price.
<3 x

1/19/2008 8:31 am  
Blogger Natasha Lim said...

i can so totally relate to that.

1/19/2008 12:10 pm  
Blogger castalnetta said...

ragingbull : will do one of the days

loopyloobi : hows u n jon?

tasha : blahh!!!! >.<

1/19/2008 4:40 pm  
Blogger loopyloobi said...

hi hi,
yeah we're good thanks. moving house on saturday so looking forward to actually getting there =P
nearly time to come isnt it? about 2wks?
<3 x

1/23/2008 8:51 am  
Blogger Pannis McMannis said...

Was asked a question when i was hiking with my folks and some of their school friends (back in the day~~ lol) - what would you do if your friends saw me and laughed at you for taking me (my mum) to the movies?
I didn't hesitate at all and swiftly responded - I'd ask them where's their mum, are they ashamed of someone who brought you to this world?

Before you ask, "what does that have to do with anything" stop and think.

1/29/2008 8:23 pm  

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